Couch Potatoe

So... I'm pretty sure I've mentioned the couch ornament that is my roommate before. If not, I have a roommate that does absolutely nothing but sit in front of the TV all day long. Literally. I leave, he's on the couch, I get back and he's in the exact same position. It irks me to know that someone's entire existence can consist of sitting in on the couch all day.

I was bothered by the fact that this bothered me so much. I wondered if maybe I was just jealous or missing out on something, so when the opportunity came, I figured I'd give it a try.

Last night, the three other people who dwell here (two roommates and a girlfriend) decided to go to out to eat. Was I invited? Not until they were leaving and I asked where everyone was going. My response to the invite, "Fuck you all." Anyway, while they were gone I got a little rest in my room, then made dinner and started watching tv. I believe this was around 7. I figured this was a way to both find out if I was really missing out on something and to give them a feel of what it's like to have the tv hogged all night.

They came back around 7:15 and I had just started eating, so I'm sure they assumed I'd be there for a little while. The couch ornament came out to watch tv for a minute, but he wasn't that interested in Ice Cube's Behind The Music episode (Thank you VH1). At 8 I started the two hour HGTV block. I <3 HGTV, but I was already tired of sitting there by 9. I was determined not to let them win though!! I stayed and watched property vigrins (probably my fav HGTV show) until the show my night was for came on at 10.

I guess I forgot to mention that. Another piece of the puzzle is the unwritten rule that whoever gets to the remote first controls it until they leave. I wanted to watch Hef's Runaway Bride at 10, and I knew the couch ornament would be back by then, so sacrifices had to be made. Anyway, I lasted from 7-11 in the couch. That's got to be a record for me, one that I'm not proud of.I could've been so productive in that time, but instead I chose to guard the remote in order to catch a show and prove a point. Yes, I was successful at both.

Fortunately, we will all be moving away from each other in less than two weeks! I'm excited to get out of here. I've already called the cable and electric company. I would hope the roommates are gone before I am. If not, they will have a hot house with no furniture to look after for a few days.

Google+

Well, I've been using Google+ for a few days now. I use the term "using" very loosely, as I have done little more than to set up my profile and add a few pics. Who knows, maybe when more people join I'll be able to experiment with it a little more. Speaking of more people joining, if you'd like an invite, let me know.

If I could I would...

Leave.

The first thing I want to do once I have the means, is get out of the Midwest. Honestly, it's not horrible out here, but the small mindedness of small town people closes off a lot of the world to this area. I know there's so much more out there, and I won't be satisfied until I see it. There have been many times where I just wanted to point my car in a certain direction and just go. Unfortunately, my work here is not done, and until it is, I will remain. I'm only able to approach each Midwestern morning with an intense drive because I was California dreaming the night before.

Why California? Why not? Yes, the cost of living and potential job market don't look great, but the culture, change of pace, and scenary create a priceless experience. That's what draws me there.

If I could I would....

For the longest, all I could think of was that phrase "If I could I would," and nothing else. Then I thought about what I want to do more than anything, and leave was the first thing to pop in my head. That's also the most probable thing I could do. Eventually I will leave, and take my talents to the west coast.

Today

As you can tell by the title of the blog, I'm always thinking about tomorrow. Today I was focused in today. I'm in a good place for the most part right now. Opportunities are everywhere and all of them are promising. For the first time in a long time I was able to just sit back and take it all in. It was almost overwhelming. I'm grateful for both the opportunities in my life and the lessons I've learned. This has been a summer of fun, learning, and growth. I'm enjoying every moment of it, and we still have tomorrow...

I got all my sisters and me

I spent more time with family this past weekend than I have all year so far. Both of my sisters were in town from VA and Vegas so my entire weekend was dedicated to them. I cooked, took one of them and her husband on a tour of the city, and got to see my niece dance at church. In 23 years of life, I've never felt closer to my sisters. Growing up I lived with one of my sisters, and the other one lived in Michigan with my brothers and my dad. The sister I lived with was 7 years older than me so we didn't really hang out at all. I was practically an only child, my dad always stressed my relationship with my siblings. He used to tell me that we needed to be close because we would only have each other after he died. At the time of his death, we were closer, but not as close as he would've liked. Since then we've all leaned on each other yet drifted as well. Distance is like termites on the foundation of a relationship. It slowly eats away at it until the foundation itself breaks and the relationship has nothing to support it. This has we're spread out across the country, so distance has definitely been an issue. We're all making an effort to stay in touch through FB groups, texts, calls, etc. But we have our own lives and families as well. We're in a similar situation that the Miami Heat were in this past season. Creating and maintaining a group dymanic with people who have operated as individuals for years. It's not easy. Removing the distance made things so much easier. We were a natural part of each other's lives instead of an interuption. Hopefully this weekend strengthens the foundation enough for us to continue to build better relationships with each other.

The Temptations

Guess who's back...


I don't know how many people still follow this blog, but here's a little nugget for ya...

Anyone who's known me for any length of time knows that my favorite old school group is the Temptations. I really relate to their music even now, and I love their sound. That being said, there's always one thing that has really bothered me about them... The Temptations were always with the times, never ahead. They would keep their ear to the ground to follow the latest trends, but they never set them. That's why when people talk about the great groups from the oldschool they mention Sly and the Family Stone, Earth Wind & Fire, Marvin Gaye, etc. The Temptations had great songs back then, but they're only mentioned as a good group, not a great one.

I say that to say this: I've been different all my life. I've always been an outlier, never one to fit in. I'm not complaining about it because it made me who I am today. It allowed me to develop a comfort in being alone that I wouldn't otherwise have. BUT people who get too comfortable in that role are what we like to call Hermits. I've found that there needs to be a happy medium, and that's what I've been working towards as of late. It's been an interesting journey thus far. A lot has happened since September, and slowly, but surely, I'll fill you in. Until then, enjoy the ride!

Fear

"Face your fear and your fear will disappear"

Jazmine Sullivan has an amazing song on her Fearless album called "Fear". It's probably my favorite song on the album. I've known for a long time what my biggest fear is, and with each passing day it feels like that fear is slowly becoming realized. I thought about that today. My biggest fear could become my reality. With that realization didn't come fear, or sadness, just acceptance almost. How have I gotten to the point of acceptance with something I've feared since I was a kid? This fear is a fear that I will never get married and have someone to spend the rest of my life with. This year has been absolutely horrible for my love life and for my mind so far. There's not much else to say right now. We'll see what happens.